Hey! So we've got like a week... or less, really, til this masquerade thing and was just wondering if you were going! Not that I'm asking you to it--I didn't even technically ask Hermann--but just seeing if you're interested in going or what. I've gotta stay on top of this or you and Hermann crawl into your math hermitages and don't resurface for like ever. But yeah, this is your "come out and play" message for the week.
[Deadpan] Oh, sorry, the math hermitage must have been keeping me busy. That, or all the terrorists.
[He takes a moment to look it over, though.] ... Hm. And I suppose you'd be upset if I try to volunteer for security again, wouldn't you? [beat] Please say you would. I could use a night off.
Did you teleport them into volcanoes? If you're going to play glorified bouncer, you have to give me details.
Dude, I'd be pissed if you work security. Livid. Look. You HAVE come with us. You do not want to stand around like a secret service guy with a earpiece watching for baddies. Even the superheroes go to parties and mingle, Q, and they take the prettiest, smartest girl, and just your luck: Mako needs a date because it's kind of ridiculous to expect her to go third wheel with Hermann and me, so be her escort.
Of course not. You can watch it yourself if you want, it was all over the news. Just Google "swear-in attack October". Actually, you might want to put in the year, too, I wouldn't be surprised if this happens every other time.
[And you know, he was with you until you got to the part about taking someone and dating and sklfjsasdfk]
Um - for one thing, what? For another, you couldn't have tried to set her up with someone closer to her own age? Does Mako even know you're doing this?
[verbal flailing. Sputtering? Donald Duck impressions? Idek]
No she doesn't know and what--? No, man, no I'm not trying to set you up romantically, I just, well, geez, I just thought, you know, if you needed incentive it'd be to take a cute young lady, who is very cute and kinda young and who you already claimed to NOT be flirting with, as her escort and chaperone? Because you have things in common and we...trust you? She trusts you? And she's sweet, but she's not going to want have to hang out with Hermann and me the whole night. And wow, I guess yeah, you'd be kind of cute together, but THAT'S NOT THE POINT. It was a friend date. People do that.
Are you sure about that? Because I'm fairly certain I've never heard of such a thing.
[If it's a date then it's beyond "friends" by definition, right? Granted, he may not have been in a relationship in a very long time, but he's not oblivious to this stuff.]
Oh, you need a best friend, then. Someone to take for coffee and donuts, to see movies with, you know...friend dates. I mean, not like I have a lot of experience with this shit myself, but that level of hanging out is more than just an outing.
[Yes, but. Even jokes get dissected and taken as if they're discussion points. It's like how he argues with Hermann. It's like how that Caboose thread got so out of hand.]
Why'd you have to go and make it MATHY? Do you have a friendship equation, too? For your information, friendship is measured in amīcī, singular amīcus. Let's say we abbreviate it, uh, ami. A relationship with the highest level of ami is the Best Friend relationship, but of course you can have an un-reciprocated Best Friendship where, say, Persons A and B have a high level of ami between them--the highest ami A has with anyone--but Persons B and C have a higher level of ami (the highest for both of them), so B is A's Best Friendship, but B and C are each other's Best Friends. A could also choose not to observe any Best Friendship because theirs is not a mutual one. It's complicated.
[Good lord, leave it to the biologist to pick everything apart. He laughs, though.] There's a slight possibility you're overthinking this, Newt. And that's coming from me.
[Though he briefly entertains the thought of whether "amis" are subject to overflow error. You know, where you go so far off the friend chart that it loops around to the far negative extreme (or vice versa). It's not a great analogy, though, so he's not gonna run with it.]
Hm. I suppose I ought to dress up a little, oughtn't I? It wouldn't be much of a masquerade if I just wore the same thing as always.
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[He takes a moment to look it over, though.] ... Hm. And I suppose you'd be upset if I try to volunteer for security again, wouldn't you? [beat] Please say you would. I could use a night off.
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Dude, I'd be pissed if you work security. Livid. Look. You HAVE come with us. You do not want to stand around like a secret service guy with a earpiece watching for baddies. Even the superheroes go to parties and mingle, Q, and they take the prettiest, smartest girl, and just your luck: Mako needs a date because it's kind of ridiculous to expect her to go third wheel with Hermann and me, so be her escort.
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[And you know, he was with you until you got to the part about taking someone and dating and sklfjsasdfk]
Um - for one thing, what? For another, you couldn't have tried to set her up with someone closer to her own age? Does Mako even know you're doing this?
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No she doesn't know and what--? No, man, no I'm not trying to set you up romantically, I just, well, geez, I just thought, you know, if you needed incentive it'd be to take a cute young lady, who is very cute and kinda young and who you already claimed to NOT be flirting with, as her escort and chaperone? Because you have things in common and we...trust you? She trusts you? And she's sweet, but she's not going to want have to hang out with Hermann and me the whole night. And wow, I guess yeah, you'd be kind of cute together, but THAT'S NOT THE POINT. It was a friend date. People do that.
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[If it's a date then it's beyond "friends" by definition, right? Granted, he may not have been in a relationship in a very long time, but he's not oblivious to this stuff.]
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[THIS IS A JOKE, obviously]
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Why'd you have to go and make it MATHY? Do you have a friendship equation, too? For your information, friendship is measured in amīcī, singular amīcus. Let's say we abbreviate it, uh, ami. A relationship with the highest level of ami is the Best Friend relationship, but of course you can have an un-reciprocated Best Friendship where, say, Persons A and B have a high level of ami between them--the highest ami A has with anyone--but Persons B and C have a higher level of ami (the highest for both of them), so B is A's Best Friendship, but B and C are each other's Best Friends. A could also choose not to observe any Best Friendship because theirs is not a mutual one. It's complicated.
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[Though he briefly entertains the thought of whether "amis" are subject to overflow error. You know, where you go so far off the friend chart that it loops around to the far negative extreme (or vice versa). It's not a great analogy, though, so he's not gonna run with it.]
Hm. I suppose I ought to dress up a little, oughtn't I? It wouldn't be much of a masquerade if I just wore the same thing as always.